A Father’s Journey to Peace – Life with Down Syndrome
- By David Lowry
When Dr. Bobby Kern and his wife received the life-altering news that their unborn son had Down Syndrome, it set them on an emotional journey filled with initial shock, difficult decisions, and ultimately profound personal growth. From coping with the unexpected diagnosis to navigating the healthcare system and advocating for their son Josiah’s inclusion in education, the Kern family’s story is one of resilience, acceptance, and celebrating differences. Through it all, Dr. Kern found himself challenging long-held assumptions, deepening his capacity for empathy, and discovering unanticipated sources of healing. In this powerful episode of Peaceful Life Radio, Dr. Kern powerfully captures the transformative lessons of his family’s experience through 10 insightful quotes that provide a window into their inspirational journey.
Ten Memorable Quotes from Bobby Kern's Interview
Initial Shock of the Diagnosis
It was shock. Even taking the high risk tests that my wife took we never thought anything was going to come of that. We just thought, okay, this is just routine because of our age.
This quote highlights the initial shock and disbelief that Bobby and his wife felt upon learning that their unborn child had Down Syndrome. Despite undergoing routine prenatal tests, they never expected to receive such life-altering news. It reminds us that even when we think we are prepared, life can surprise us in unexpected ways.
Lesson: Unexpected challenges can arise at any moment, and it’s important to be resilient and adaptable in the face of such surprises.
Reconsidering Beliefs in Difficult Situations
I don't think either of us ever thought abortion would be a question for us. That wouldn't be something that we would do. But I gotta tell you, when you are posed that question, it makes you stop.
Here, Bobby acknowledges that while they initially thought they would never consider terminating the pregnancy, the reality of the situation made them pause and reconsider their stance. This quote highlights the complexity of such decisions and how our beliefs can be challenged when faced with difficult circumstances.
Lesson: Our values and beliefs can be tested in unexpected ways, and it’s important to approach difficult decisions with empathy and an open mind.
The Gap Between Beliefs and Reality
It doesn't matter what you think you believe until you're in a situation.
This powerful quote reinforces the idea that our true beliefs and values are often tested when we face real-life challenges. It’s easy to hold certain beliefs in theory, but our actions and decisions in difficult situations reveal our true character.
Lesson: Be mindful of the gap between your stated beliefs and how you respond to adversity in practice. Strive for self-awareness and authenticity.
The Need for Empathy, Not Solutions
We don't always need somebody to fix our problem. We need somebody to come in and love us in the midst of it.
In this quote, Bobby highlights the importance of empathy and emotional support when facing challenges. Rather than trying to “fix” the situation, what people often need most is compassion and understanding from those around them.
Lesson: When supporting others through difficult times, prioritize listening and offering unconditional love and acceptance over trying to solve their problems.
Finding Support in a Community of Understanding
They let me see, them interacting with their sons. They talked to me about their experience and how it was going to be okay. They were there for us during the open-heart surgery and they've really become dear, dear friends.
This quote illustrates the power of community and support from others who have faced similar challenges. Bobby found solace and guidance from other fathers of children with Down Syndrome, who showed him that it was possible to navigate this journey with grace and resilience.
Lesson: Seeking out and connecting with others who have been through similar experiences can provide invaluable support, perspective, and hope.
Embracing Unconditional Love and Inclusion
I want to be just like her. I don't have time for marginalizing anyone for anything anymore. I don't have time for negativity and excuses in relationships. I want to love people. I want them to know they are loved.
In this quote, Bobby expresses his desire to emulate his daughter’s fierce advocacy and unconditional love for others, regardless of others differences or disabilities. He recognizes the importance of embracing diversity and fostering inclusive relationships.
Lesson: Cultivating a mindset of acceptance, love, and inclusivity can enrich our lives and create a more compassionate world.
Challenging Assumptions About Others
He definitely has challenged me to challenge my own assumptions about anyone, right? I try not to walk into any room assuming anything about anyone anymore because Joe has taught me that everyone has something to offer and it's always beautiful. It's always valuable.
Here, Bobby acknowledges how his son Josiah has helped him overcome preconceived notions and assumptions about others. He has learned to approach each person with an open mind and appreciate their unique strengths and contributions.
Lesson: Challenging our assumptions and biases can open our eyes to the inherent worth and value of every individual, fostering greater understanding and appreciation for diversity.
Seeing the Person, Not the Disability
I don't see that extra chromosome. I don't see Down Syndrome. When I look at him, I see my kid and he's got my personality. He looks like me. He is definitely a chip off the old block. That's all I see. I just see Josiah.
In this quote, Bobby emphasizes that he sees his son Josiah as an individual, not defined by his disability. He recognizes their shared traits and similarities, rather than focusing on Josiah’s Down Syndrome.
Lesson: Looking beyond labels and disabilities to see the whole person can foster deeper connections and appreciation for each individual’s unique identity and humanity.
Unexpected Sources of Healing
And what we thought we were ... naming him was about him. What we realized was that Jehovah has used Josiah to heal us, which is really cool.
This quote reflects Bobby’s realization that while they named their son Josiah, meaning “Jehovah heals,” it was Josiah who ultimately helped heal and transform them as individuals and as a family.
Lesson: Sometimes, the greatest lessons and sources of healing come from unexpected places, reminding us to remain open to growth and transformation, even in challenging circumstances.
Finding Joy in Shared Passions
He loves being on stage. I dabble in comedy in both improv and standup, and we've created an entire set of dad jokes. Josiah will be on stage with me while I'm delivering these corny dad jokes. He's my rimshot guy who plays the snare drum and hits the rimshot and everybody laughs.
This quote showcases the special bond between Bobby and Josiah, as well as Josiah’s love for performing and being on stage. It highlights their shared passion for comedy and the joy they find in performing together.
Lesson: Embracing and nurturing our children’s unique interests and talents can foster a deeper connection and create cherished memories, even in the face of challenges.
Conclusion
Dr. Bobby Kern’s inspirational journey with his son Josiah serves as a poignant reminder that life’s greatest challenges can ultimately become profound sources of growth, healing, and unconditional love. From the initial “shock” of the Down Syndrome diagnosis1 to reconsidering long-held beliefs, finding strength in community, and celebrating differences, Dr. Kern’s story is a testament to the transformative power of embracing life’s unexpected paths with resilience and an open heart. His words underscore the importance of challenging assumptions, nurturing unique passions, and recognizing our shared humanity beyond labels and disabilities. To hear Dr. Kern’s full narrative and gain further insights into navigating adversity with grace, listen now to the powerful podcast episode “A Father’s Journey – Navigating Life with Josiah” on Peaceful Life Radio.